There are a lot of tricky things about parenthood. One of which is knowing how MUCH to give our children. Most parents seem to want their kids to have a little more than they had growing up, which I don't think is necessarily a bad thing. However, I have to shake my head at how much stuff kids these days have. I grew up in a family where for a long time we simply didn't have enough money for "stuff". My mom and dad worked hard to provide for our needs and some of our wants, but there certainly wasn't a lot of excess. Then later, when they could afford more, they still tried to be moderate in their spending. I really appreciate their examples because it is tempting to think that we need to buy our kids all the latest and greatest things available. For example, several of my nieces and nephews have their own iPods and now my kids are asking for one. I've told them no. I think it is purely ridiculous to think of spending that much money on a gadget they will most likely break or lose. (One of my nephews got one for Christmas and lost it within the week). Also, if you buy them an iPod when they are 7 where do you go from there? What kind of gift do you get them when they are 14?? I think it's important to celebrate and to treat our kids to something special on holidays, but it's amazing how far a few simple, well-chosen gifts can go. I also think it is a service to our kids to keep their lives simple and uncluttered. The more stuff they have, the more they have to take care of, and the harder it is to keep their rooms clean. It's great to spoil our kids with love and attention, but spoiling them with stuff is just too much!!!!
About Me
- Jessi
- Mom of five lovely daughters, wife of one dashing man. Born in Utah, grew up in Oregon, live in Georgia.
10 comments:
I think the point you made is very wise! When 'stuff' comes automatically, kids don't learn to value and appreciate it. And there is definitely a point of having too much. Keep up your good work helping your kids learn to value the things they have and to know life isn't about possessing 'stuff.'
So true, Jessi. The race to keep up with the Jones' can never be won. I know a lot of unhappy people because they either think they don't have enough stuff, or because they went in debt to get it.
This is very timely since Hannah's birthday is tomorrow and Ali's is next Friday. Ali probably isn't old enough to even care how MANY presents she opens (she's turning 2). And I've had a hard time thinking of what to buy Hannah. They both have plenty of toys (in Excess, even... that's what you get when you have loving grandparents and hand me downs from cousins... and then parents who like to get ya stuff too...)
I saw a cheap MP3 player on sale at Toys R US... $20, but then I thought ya know... I could just burn her some CD's with the music she likes on them. If she looses, scratches or breaks it, no big deal... it cost me mere pennies (whatever that blank CD cost me months ago when I bought the pack at Sam's club) and when she's older she can have an MP3 player. I don't even own an IPod! And my little 1GB Nano MP3 player that you have to shuffle through each song to find what you want works just great for me (speaking of which, where is that thing right now?!)
I totally agree. I'm always having to tell John, no.. she doesn't need that. He's always trying to get her things that she'll never use more than once or that's completely rediculous. She's 8 but John thinks she needs her own laptop! What's an 8 year old going to do with a laptop!?
You are so right! I am in complete agreement with you! And your kids will thank you later.
I'm with you! When do kids need cell phones? and ipods and calculators they don't know how to use? I have to remind myself sometimes that I don't need what my parents have now, it took them 35 years to get it!
stick to your guns!! Our whole society is bogged down with "stuff" and it just gets worse as the kids who get everything want more and more. A disservice in the long run. Our church leaders talk about this issue alot more so you know it is a growing problem that we need to keep in check.
TOTALLY AGREE!!! My ex- in-laws seem to give at least 3 presents to each of the boys EVERY time they see them. I am not saying they are bad people, but I think it is too much and we end up having WAY WAY WAY Too many "things" around the home. Not to mention, when can I ever buy them anything when I want to because they have too much! So I finally had to tell them that they needed to keep the things at their home what they buy for the kids and they can play with all of it when they are at their home. Brayden already asks for cell phones and lap tops! AHH... It is wise Jessi!! We can spoil with affection and that is what matters in the long run! Making memories that last, instead of buying things all the time! They won't remember their "stuff" later on in life!
Isn't it sad that so many children feel deprived when they don't get an ipod or cell phone when there are millions of children starving? It's the classic argument, but it really is true. We have so much more than we realize, and it's gratitude and relationships, not "stuff" that makes us happy.
very well said! I like the spoi our kids with love and attention rather than stuff. Because of your post/reminder. My kids got an extra dose of love and attention today :) My house was a little neglected. But I'm sure it won't mind.
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